I’m tired but I can’t sleep. Can’t even bring myself to close my eyes. Feeling too much. Thinking too much. Yet I can barely move. Or maybe just don’t want to. This is overwhelming, paralysing.
I feel like crying and I don’t know why. Now I’m crying and I don’t like it. I feel victimised by my own intensity. Betrayed by my own emotions. Wet by my own tears.
I want to take one step and then another and then another until I leave all this behind. But I know I can’t. And I won’t.
Still I wish I could just walk away.
Don’t you hate it when life feels like a nightmare that you can’t wake up from?